What happened?

God, what happened?
I knew I needed rest, and tried to go there, but didn't "get there," at least on the inside, until day 2.
So...what am I supposed to do now.
All I want to do is cry.
Thankfully I (finally) feeel like I can connect to You
But...time is short
I have much to do
Tomorrow, bright and early I must be up and at it
And tonight, still much to do before that.

I knew I needed rest, time off...
But it was broken off
...

help

The tension, the overwhelm...is excruciating.
God, help!
I need a way out of this.
I need hope.
I need steps to take to be free of this.
Or to find a way to cope...somehow...in the meantime.

Jesus...

Jesus...

Jesus...

Jesus...

Weak, hurting...

God, what do You want of me?
What should I do?
How should I be seeing all this?
How am I supposed to go on?
Where can I find motivation?
Why does this hurt so much?
When will it stop hurting?
Why do I feel so trapped?
How and when and what is the way out of this trap?
When I am weak, then am I strong?
Nah, this is just...
    weak,
    very weak,
    nothing but weak

But
What do You want of me?
What are You doing in this?
Take me where You want me to go
Make of me what You want
Lead me
But first...
please hold me...

and do what You want with me.

Lord, help
Suddenly today I am tired, overwhelmed, and so, so afraid.
And so I cry out to you.
Please, come
Meet me

hurts today...

God, it hurts today

the waiting

the questions

the feeling of rejection

and I'm empty

too many days

not filled with You

I can go a few

I guess

just leaning in

resting

surrounded

You understand how the days go

but when there is opportunity to come back

to refill

I'd best do it

and I didn't

so...here I am

the feelings come

the discouragement

the lostness

the lack of motivation...

help me come back

to leave these cisterns that don't hold water

and return to You

the spring of living water

lead me to a life

filled and overflowing

I was on the way

almost there

it's possible

help me come...

I don't know how to come...

Lord, I don't know how to come to You today.
Well, I guess this IS coming, it's the only way I know how right now.

I'm a mess.
Today...pretty much all I can see is failure.
And so lacking...is any desire (well, almost all lacking) to face life, face work, face the problems, face the people.
Please help.
What is wrong with my perspective?
What am I seeing incorrectly?
Why this "give up" that rises so strong at times?

You, God, are strength,
"a very present help"
As M.A. said, there will never be a time where I will look back and find You were not there.

So I cry out to You for help today.
Help me Lord, to find the hope I need, the faith I need.
Help me to want to try.
And, oh God, can You please send some other physical help? Help at the level of  administering, deciding, directing. This burden feels so heavy. I feel so all alone and incompetent. I'm not leading well. They deserve better than this.

And today I read...and choose to believe

And my God will supply

every need of yours

according to His riches

in glory in Christ Jesus

Phil.4:19